Where The Unicorns Live…
Since children we have been conditioned to believe that happily ever after is somewhere in a far off land. A wondrous place that is illusive and sometimes difficult for us to reach. We must set out on a quest in search of it. We must defeat all of the evil foes along the journey who stand in our way of finding this joy we seek. The underlying message always seems to have us in search of. In search of a higher, lighter, better state of mind. And we must fight and struggle to get there. Chasing rainbows to find the pot of gold. Finding four-leaf clovers for good luck. The world seems to be full of falsehoods with Prince Charmings, Snow Whites, Wicked Witches and Happily Ever Afters. Then at some point….after we’ve grown in age, we become disenchanted with the enchanted. We turn away from the world we’ve been conditioned to believe is perhaps possible on some levels. While we still hold out hopes of fairy tales and wonderful dreams that come true, as a grown up we tend to replace the “fairy tales” with the tales of “reality.”
Over the past several weeks, we’ve discussed creating and holding the visions of your desires. We’ve spoken about the Law of Attraction and your vibrational markers. We’ve spoken a lot about what CAN be and WILL be depending on how you react, create and respond. So now, let’s talk about where you currently stand. Your current state of mind. Your current “reality.”
In my lifetime, I’ve been blessed. I have a tremendous drive for success and that has served me well in the Corporate American environment where I earn my money. (I am ONLY saying this to make a point. That is the only motivation here.) Anyone else looking at my life would agree that from what they can see, it looks like this man has made it to the top. His happiness, in the reality of his success, must be monumental. But what I have learned is, the best wealth for a person to have is living in his/her best QUALITY of life and not the most QUANTITY of life. There is no happiness in material things. But there is true happiness in the sublime. I spoke with my sister recently who is another, highly-driven, career-oriented, successful person in Corporate America. The both of us in our 40’s, we talked about the epiphany of realizing we’ve been chasing the wrong things. We have both been chasing Corporate success and promotion for years. Corporate success has been our motivating factors driving our perceived happiness in the workplace. The real epiphany is understanding that chasing corporate success in the name of finding ultimate happiness is the equivalent to chasing rainbows and looking for the pot of gold. It is the equal to depending on four-leaf clovers and expecting good things to happen. It is comparable to searching for Prince Charming or Snow White with the expectation that once you find them, happily ever after is inevitable. It is the same as searching for unicorns.
In my personal experience, within every step up on the Corporate ladder lies a fleeting hint of joy and happiness where I had anticipated sustained delight of my success. What actually comes next is the heavy burden of achievement expectation and output that may, but most times does not, align with who I truly am. And being in alignment with who I truly am also helps determine my true happiness. In other words, as the great poet Paul Laurence Dunbar said, “We Wear The Mask.” We wear the mask to assimilate with our environment with the expectation of acceptance and happiness. However, we tend to become one with the mask, and in turn, tends to hide who we truly are which stifles our understanding of what we truly desire and what makes us truly happy.
So….how do we find our true happiness? First, we must stop depending on someone or some THING to measure our happiness. If you are depending on some person or some thing to measure your state of happiness, you will ALWAYS come up short of the mark. Let us understand that gratitude and happiness are forever linked. When determining your level of happiness on any given day at any given time in the midst of any given situation; acknowledge, speak and quantify your gratitude. In the midst of a tough situation, what are you grateful for? Your boss has you upset….what good traits are there about him/her that you admire? Your significant other disappointed you…what are some of the things that person does that excites you in a positive way? You’re angry about your lack of weight loss….what positive things can you say about yourself that you are proud of? Changing your focus will elevate your vibrational marker. Continuous focus on the negative begets more negativity. If your desire is to be happy, we have the ability to create that happiness instantaneously. Identify one thing you are grateful for and focus on that thing. List all of the ways you are grateful for having that thing in your life. (HINT: Its even better when that “thing” is not manmade) As you focus on what you are grateful for, you will feel a higher sense of happiness come over you. Being grateful and living grateful elevates your vibrational marker. Elevating your vibrational marker puts you more in line with who you truly are. Becoming more aligned with who you truly are allows for less resistance of your desires. Less resistance blocking your desires opens up the channels for you to receive your desires. Receiving desires that are aligned with who you truly are guarantees our TRUE happiness! This is not an exercise in suppression of emotion. Or a bombardment of positive thinking. This is deliberate creation of happiness.
The reason material things don’t bring happiness is because material things are fragile, shallow and temporary. We thrive in the ethereal because we are ethereal beings. Why does walking along the beach, taking a jog outside or simply working in your garden make you feel a certain way? It is because we are closest with the one who created us when we do. We feel the comforts of our true home. When we continually pursue those things of material or constructed of man or man’s institutions in search of happiness…we will always fail our true selves. Our true selves delight in the non-material. Find happiness in the crisp air of the winter winds. Become excited about the sun shining on your face. Be grateful for the unconditional love your pet brings to you. Discover joy in the simple fact that you woke up this morning and that you have a CHOICE on what type of day you decide to have. Choose to be happy and find something of joy in ALL things EVERY day. We can not depend on things or others to determine our happily ever after. Happily ever after is happening constantly as long as you allow it. Say to yourself….today….I behold all of the abundance that surrounds me. The end of the rainbow is at my front door. My significant other and I ARE Prince Charming and Snow White. My front yard is FULL of four-leaf clovers. And the unicorns live in my backyard.