Week 47 – Sustaining Your Happiness through Alignment
Have you ever been trying to live your “happily ever after” but someone seems to ALWAYS want to take it away from you? Have you ever been having a GREAT day, but someone wants to intrude on your joy and try to shut down your happiness? Does it seem like certain people simply “have it out for you” and look to try and take away what you are building??? Don’t we become frustrated with these types of people? Try to avoid them? Bristle up whenever we know they are coming around? Get “mentally prepared” for the drama? Get “physically prepared” for the battle that is inevitably coming? We are expecting there to be a “war” that will take us away from the happiness we are seeking to sustain. Why? Because we know this is how these people like to act. We ALL know people who seem to find their happiness in chaos. They seem to thrive on the drama of life. They don’t seem to be satisfied unless some “mess” is jumping off. We all know them. We may live with them. We may work with them. They may even be us…
So, in Learning to Live Happily Ever After, how do we avoid these people, so they don’t wreck our joy? How do we change these people, so we don’t have to continue with their drama? Or how do we make them stop? The answer is…we don’t. In Learning to Live Happily Ever After, we find alignment within ourselves first and foremost. We find alignment within ourselves first, middle and last. We find alignment within ourselves at ALL times, to determine the level of happiness we want to maintain. Determining your alignment is first about determining WHAT and HOW you WANT to feel. And then CHOOSING to feel that way. No matter the circumstance. This doesn’t mean that you suppress feelings and ignore circumstances as if they don’t exist. That’s silly. But what it means is, authentically “seeing” situations, circumstances, people, etc. for what they are and for who they are and then determining what effect, if any, you will allow them to have on what you set out to feel in the first place.
Often times, when we are faced with a challenging person or a challenging situation, we allow those things to affect our moods and our emotions. We (Align to Enlighten) would like to offer you this: Take in the situation, the challenge; feel what you feel when confronted with it, and immediately DECIDE how you WANT to feel next. The ONLY thing we control in this world…is how we choose to feel. And we can choose to change that feeling at the drop of a dime simply by how we choose to be aligned. Allow me to provide some examples…
If you have decided to be happy today. And your mate says or does something that angers you. The next decision you make is completely yours on how you decide to feel. Do you WANT to remain angry for the rest of the day? Or do you WANT to get back to the happiness you decided to feel in the first place? You are not so completely out of control of your emotions that you MUST remain upset for the rest of the day. You have complete control over the choices you make in deciding how you want to feel. However, sometimes it IS hard to flip back to being happy when someone has made you angry. And many times, it’s NOT a light switch that you can flip on and off. Our emotions do not work like that most times. Think of it more like a “dimming-switch” you have on your lights. You gradually turn the lights up to get them back to full illumination. One way, in this example of your mate making you angry, to do that is reach for a thought that gives you pleasure about your mate. In the midst of them making you angry and you deciding to CHOOSE to be happy, what one thing can you think of that you are grateful for regarding your mate? Ask yourself and then answer that question. Literally. In that moment, you have increased the light on your “dimming-switch” and a little more illumination has come over your emotions. Keep reaching for thoughts like that and you will find the light becomes increasingly brighter until you are back to the happiness you wanted in the first place. You will be back in alignment with your true desire…to be happy.
In the midst of tragedy, the same holds true. Heartache, pain, suffering, emotional turmoil…happen. But if/when it does, we don’t have to be emotionally bound and gagged by it. We don’t have to be a slave to the heartache, pain and suffering. It doesn’t mean you become immune and callous to what you feel. It means you become empowered to make a different emotional choice. If someone close to you passes away, if your home becomes flooded, if a fire destroys your belongings, whatever the case may be, remember the “dimming-switch” of your emotions. Purposefully seek a higher-feeling emotion in the midst of whatever is happening and CHOOSE to focus on that thing. Someone passes away…what are the fond memories that make you feel good at that moment? Your home becomes flooded…what can you look forward to in regards to what will happen next? Will insurance provide you with brand new carpeting? New floors? New paint? A fire destroys your belongings…look forward to creating new memories, new happiness and new nostalgia. It’s a “dimming-switch” to help you pull your emotion from darkness to light. And it simply takes one thought at a time. Create that thought that focusses on one small piece of happiness at a time. Then add another and focus on it. Then another and another and another. Until you have brought yourself back into alignment with your fundamental desire of happiness.
When Learning to Live Happily Ever After there is no pixy dust to sprinkle over your life. It doesn’t imply living some type of facade or fallacy. Learning to Live Happily Ever After is about living deliberately in accordance with what you truly desire in life. When we learn that the only thing we control is how we FEEL, we become empowered to direct the happiness in our lives…on command.