Week 1 – Finding Comfort In Who You Are…
Welcome to January 1, 2017. Did you set New Year’s resolutions? Did you vow to lose the weight that has irritated you for months? Do you have a workout plan? Are you resolved to turn over a new leaf at work? Did you create a resolution to be a better parent, sibling, son, daughter or better person overall? Is 2017 “your year?” Whatever it is you have set resolutions for, we are with you and support your efforts. Whatever you set your mind to do, you can achieve. However, we’d also like to offer the ability of finding comfort in EXACTLY who you are today.
Often times, we look forward to the new year’s arrival because it symbolizes a new beginning. A fresh start. An opportunity to correct all the things we may think are “wrong” with ourselves. Other times we look to the new year as the starting point to create something wonderful in our lives. And sometimes we start the new year full of hope in achieving the things we are resolved to do but those resolutions fall by the wayside throughout the year and we may feel dejected because we did not “stick to the plan.” So we levy judgment against ourselves or we chastise ourselves with little forgiveness. But how about simply being comfortable in our skin to begin with? There is NOTHING “wrong” with having New Year’s resolutions. Nothing at all. But the question is, do our resolutions define who we are or want to be? Or do WE define the resolution?
Finding simple comfort and acceptance within ourselves offers freedom for our souls. Again, there is absolutely nothing wrong with resolutions. But the point is to not let the resolutions define you. But first define yourself. We are all spiritual beings having a human experience. To that end, we are not defined by the material things in our world. Including the material of our bodies. Vowing to your psyche that “you will lose this weight or ELSE” does no good for the authentic you…your soul. People may respond to that as, “well when I’ve lost weight before, I felt better about myself.” And that may be true. But again, the point is, let’s try to feel better about ourselves in the first place. Weight loss or no weight loss. Understanding who you are at the core of your being provides comfort, stability, confidence, tranquility and peace.
I remember growing up as a selfish, self-centered, stingy and ungrateful type of person. After many years of self-reflection and New Year’s resolutions, I still found myself uncomfortable in my own skin sometimes. I would resolve to ‘be a better person’ and inevitably, I would find myself in the same situations, reacting in the same ways I’d vowed to avoid. But along this journey with Align to Enlighten, I’ve discovered my authentic self. That authentic self operates fundamentally from a place of love. That authentic self does not pass judgment. That authentic self is FREE. Free to simply be. And that FREEDOM is what provides comfort within myself.
Over these holidays we’ve spent time with lots of family. And as with most families, we tend to have a great time when we all come together to celebrate the holidays. We get to see family members who live in other states that we don’t typically get to spend time with. The fellowship is a wonderful thing in bringing wholeness back to the family. But also as with some families, at least with mine, there sometimes is the drama. The drama of this person or that person passing self-righteous judgment on others based on their own lives. Drama of people’s opinions masked as the only authentic truth that everyone else must abide by otherwise YOU are the one who is “wrong.” Then sometimes others pile on with that and several people start talking about the other members of the family all in agreement of the judgment that has been passed. “Why did she cook THAT? Joe Blow has gained SO much weight! He looks horrible. Look at these children and how they’re acting. She always has a bad attitude. He is so selfish!” It goes on and on. But authentic understanding is, just because someone voices their opinion, doesn’t make it fact. EVER. But that doesn’t only count for family, friends and acquaintances. It also applies to how we see ourselves. We tend to be relentlessly unforgiving of ourselves in the same ways. “I need to do or be better. Why did I do that? I’m so dumb for being that way.” These are the types of judgments we also levy on ourselves.
So over these holidays, as the drama unfolded and was directed at me, I found comfort in who I am. I know that I am not the person people have made their opinions about. I know exactly WHO I am as a person at the fundamental level. Knowing who you are at the fundamental level provides a solid rock foundation that no dramatic storms or winds can shake. Knowing who you are at the foundational level provides insulation and protection from those who would look to discount your being or devalue your existence. At the fundamental level of your being is the authentic you. The you that only you know and understand. Others can only swipe at who they THINK you are. Do not waiver from your true existence. When we do that, we are lying to ourselves and that does not serve us well and is unsustainable. As we create our New Year’s resolutions and strive to improve our lives and our characters, personalities and actions, let’s also be aware that the core of our being is absolutely perfect as it is. Everything we desire to have and to be is possible with the understanding of who we are in the first place…a soul that was birthed from God, full of love, compassion, peace, joy, happiness and tranquility. That is who we ALL are at the fundamental level of our being.
So as we start a new journey into 2017, we urge you to not lose sight of the fact that there is extreme comfort in loving yourself…just as you are. Knowing yourself and being the person you desire to be is the ultimate selfishness that creates the happiness you seek from within. Not from what the scale says. Not from what someone else says you are. Not the way society has labeled you. YOUR happiness and well-being are created from within. So LOVE yourself as you are. Find comfort within yourself in that ‘knowing’ of who you are. And simply know…whatever someone says, however someone else sees you or whatever you’ve been labeled as being, is all a façade. A façade that you can choose to make your reality…or not. But first understand that you are not defined by any of that. You are defined by what YOU have decided to be defined as. And when you find happiness within yourself by knowing that authentic fact…you will ALWAYS find comfort in being who you are.